Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Flash Fiction "February 1809" by author Karen Charlton.

I held a contest for Flash fiction based on the photograph below. I received only one entry. A damned fine entry. However one entry does not a contest make. I appreciate the time and effort author Karen Charlton took, and whilst it can't be judged against any other story, it is too fine a piece to leave unacknowledged.


So...for your reading enjoyment and with my sincere thanks; here it is.








February 1809

It was always dark on this stretch of road.

The naked branches of the winter trees arched above Jamie’s head and blocked out the moonlight.  Thunder rumbled ominously in the distance.  The invisible ground sank softly beneath every step. He knew the path well but it was better to be cautious. 

The two pounds he’d received from Tom Phillips were in his breeches pocket and chinked with every step he took. In this silence, the soft chink-chink of metal against metal would carry a long way.

He heard a small owl hoot in alarm. To his right, a branch cracked beneath the foot of a heavy animal. He listened carefully. Nothing.

All he could make out were the brooding tree trunks, silhouetted against the dense undergrowth. That didn’t mean that no one was there, watching him.

Who’d have thought that there were so many shades of black in the world?

He lowered himself to his haunches and groped along the ground for a weapon. Anything.  A rock, a branch, anything. His frozen fingers found shards of ice, briers and small stones. Suddenly, they closed on the flaking stem of a sturdy branch. He tugged it away from the briers and tested its weight and length. It would do.

Cautiously, he rose. His ears burned for the sound of soft footfalls, the rustle of dead leaves.

Then he heard them. There were two of them and they moved fast.  

A fist crashed into his face, knocking him backwards. Pain seared through his nose and he tasted blood. He lashed out with his weapon and missed. Another iron fist thudded into his gut. Briefly, he bent double with pain. Summoning every last ounce of strength, he raised himself and swiped his cudgel again and again at the menacing shapes which taunted him. 

He hit home: twice.

There was a yelp of anguish and the figures backed off.  One of them limped.

 ‘I’ve not got nowt, yer bastards. Bugger off!’

‘We’re not here ter rob yer.’

‘Then what the hell do you want?’ Jamie clutched his weapon tighter as a shadowy figure began to circle him.  His eyes darted between his attackers.

‘We’ve come fer what yer owe.’

‘Owe? Owe who?’
‘Yer owe the butcher in Morpeth, over two pounds. He’s our mate. Ye’ve just got two pounds from Tom Phillips in the pub when yer sold him yer watch.’

 ‘Well, ye’d better come and get it, hadn’t yer?’ he snarled.
There was a pause. The footpads hesitated. Limping man still wheezed and clutched his neck. 

Anger surged through Jamie. Swearing and screaming abuse, he raised his stick and charged. The unharmed man turned, fled and dragged his companion away. They crashed back into the forest.

‘Bloody cowards! Damn Eddie Chaloner! Sod off the lot of yer!’ he yelled

His curses rebounded off ancient oaks and echoed back. 

Silence had returned to the black woods.

Suddenly, a flash of lightening illuminated the road. He could see again.

They had gone.


Karen Charlton

author of
Catching the Eagle
The Missing Heiress

Seeking Our Eagle
Famelton Publishing

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Contest: Every Picture Tells A Story! Flash Fiction.

Hello and welcome to the new contest for 2013. Images all tell a story, and our perceptions of each image differs. This contest provides you with an image that will change each month. The challenge is for you to write a flash fiction story of 500 words or less to accompany the image I provide.

The Flash Fiction piece must compliment this image.



500 words or less in ANY genre.

Submissions open Monday January 14th.

Submissions close Tuesday January 22nd.

Prize...$25 Amazon gift card.

All entries will be titled and numbered only, this will be a blind vote. Voting will commence on Wednesday January 23rd  ... with the winning entry announced on January 25th.

The winner will be promoted on this blog for the 30 days after the announcement.

Send your entries to suzieb4burke@hotmail.com  please ensure that Flash Fiction appears in the subject line.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Making readers FEEL emotions. Guest post by author Jean Gill

Welcome to my first guest of 2013, Jean Gill won Paragraphs Of Power in November 2012, I am delighted to have her as my first Guest to kick off 2013.


Making readers feel emotions: Guest Post by Jean Gill.


You want to make your reader feel the emotions in what you’re writing?


The classic mistake – and we’ve all made it! -  is to assume that because you feel emotional about what you’re writing, then so will the reader.  The truth is that it’s not about what you feel; it’s about communicating that feeling. We might not always work the magic but there are some tips that I find helpful.

Compare a) and b)

a)    Janie had loved her mother deeply. Every object in the room made her miss her mother more.

b)   She uncapped her mother’s lipstick. Deep pink, worn unevenly in the three-swipe movement Janie had seen a thousand times in the mirror. As individual as a finger-print. Janie held the lipstick up to her own reflected mouth but her hand shook and refused to destroy her mother’s traces. Careful not to catch the edge, she replaced  the gold cap.

On the sofa two knitting needles were crossed neatly through a ball of wool, politely, like placing knife and fork just so on a plate. Janie didn’t have to pick up the half-knit sleeve to know her mother’s patterning; tension so tight it was if she pulled every unlived dream under her control as her fingers clicked away.

I’m hoping that b) arouses more emotion than a) but I’m guessing b) also raises more questions about what the emotions in it are – good!

Many writers are told ‘Show don’t tell’ but the advice seems to mean different things to different people and can be very fuzzy, so although I think that a) tells and b) shows, I’m going to be more specific.

a)    uses emotion words; ‘loved’, ‘miss’ These area useful short-cut in telling a story but they don’t usually make you feel the emotions mentioned – they quickly give you the information you need to get on to the next part.

That could be exactly what you want to do. But if you want to involve the reader, try these tips for the b) effect.


1) Avoid the emotion words (love/fear/happy/afraid/in love/scared)

2) Cut the cliches – if words come very easily, maybe that’s because they’ve been used a million times. Readers’ imaginations skim over cliches without becoming involved.

3)  Give details and make the details personal. Reach for the shared experience (we can identify with bereavement) through creating a unique moment for an individual (Janie and her mother are unique)

In the context of a longer piece of writing

4) Build towards the emotional scene.

I was thinking about scenes in books I’ve read that have roused real emotion in me and I wondered why. I realised that I’ve felt involved with the characters in every case, (so creating such individuals is part of our job as writers) and sometimes the scene has touched me personally because of my situation (and that is entirely out of the author’s hands!)

So here’s three of my ‘most emotional scenes in fiction’ - what are yours?

1) Baloo and Bagheera vouching for Mowgli in ‘The Jungle Book’ by Rudyard Kipling. I suppose I’d like a bear and a black panther, outsiders like me, to stand up for me in public, in front of the whole wolf pack.

2) Bathsheba fighting to protect the hay in the storm, with Gabriel Oak, in ‘Far From the Madding Crowd’ by Thomas Hardy. I think there’s something very sexy about a couple working in a physical activity together, particularly when fighting the elements. To me, this is one of the most romantic scenes ever written because the reader knows that Gabriel loves Bathsheba, and the fact her useless husband is in a drunken stupor adds to the undercurrents.

3) the ending of 'Brighton Rock' by Graham Greene. This is the most terrible, heartbreaking, pessimistic scene I’ve ever read and yet it is all in the reader’s imagination. You know that what is about to happen will destroy all Rose’s naïve illusions about Pinkie.


WORKSHOP ACTIVITY

Try this activity, on your own or in a writers’ group. Collect some photos/images that show strong emotion and try to communicate in writing the emotions in one image without using any ‘emotion words’.  (If it’s a group activity, you can all work on the same image, or all have different ones) Make up anything you like for the character and the context. This activity raises some very interesting questions!
Jean Gill

www.jeangill.com
www.istockphoto.com/jeangill
www.jeangill.blogspot.com

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Featuring Paragraphs Of Power Winner Jean Gill and her book 'Song at Dawn' book giveaway!



 Welcome to Paragraphs Of Power winner for November 2012, Jean Gill.
Books by Jean Gill



Christmas GIVEAWAY to all my readers; ‘Song at Dawn’ by Jean Gill available free in all ebook forms from www.smashwords.com  if you use the coupon code FF49C when you check out. UNTIL 24th December – spread the word!

If you can find the time to post a review, whether on smashwords, amazon, goodreads, your blog, wherever, Jean will be very grateful. Feel free to add your comments to this post or contact her at jean.gill@wanadoo.fr Comments and questions from readers are always welcome

YOU’D PREFER A  PRINT VERSION? Visit, ‘like’ and post a comment on https://www.facebook.com/jeangilltroubadours There will be a random draw on 24th December and one signed copy of ‘Song at Dawn’ will go to the winner, anywhere in the world.

Author Jean Gill
Biography:

Jean Gill is a Welsh writer and photographer living in the south of France with a big white dog, a Nikon D700 and a man. For many years, she taught English in Wales and was the first woman to be a secondary headteacher in Carmarthenshire. She is mother or stepmother to five children.
Publications are varied, including prize-winning poetry and novels, military history, translated books on dog training, and a cookery book on goat cheese. With Scottish parents, an English birthplace and French residence, she can usually support the winning team on most sporting occasions.

Song at Dawn, Winner of the Global Ebooks Award for Historical Fiction (Medieval)
Book 1 of  The Troubadours series
Jean Gill


1150 in Provence, where love and marriage are as divided as Christian and Muslim. A historical thriller/romance set in Narbonne just after the Second Crusade.

 'Believable, page-turning and memorable' - S.P.Review 

On the run from abuse, Estela wakes in a ditch with only her lute, her amazing voice, and a dagger hidden in her petticoats. Her talent finds a patron in Alienor of Aquitaine and more than a music tutor in the Queen's finest troubadour and Commander of the Guard, Dragonetz los Pros. Weary of war, Dragonetz uses Jewish money and Moorish expertise to build that most modern of inventions, a papermill, arousing the wrath of the Church. Their enemies gather, ready to light the political and religious powder-keg of medieval Narbonne. 



Extract from Chapter 7.
Contrary to popular opinion, baths were taken frequently in the civilised regions of what we now know as southern France. Sometimes tubs and buckets of water were taken to individual chambers but often there were separate women’s and men’s bathing rooms in chateaux, such as the Palace of Narbonne, where Estela is learning to be a troubadour. Her day included an assassination attempt and a murder, and she went to the women’s bathing room, exhausted and shocked, thinking of other people’s enemies rather than of her own…

Estela had no sense of falling asleep nor of waking but the cooling water told her she must have done so and she shivered. Time to dry herself, to return to the world. She stood up, held onto the edge of the tub, thinking perhaps she should have kept a servant to hand after all and she placed a tentative foot on the floor beside the bath. She put her weight onto one foot to climb out of the tub and cried out with pain, trying clumsily to reverse the weight, adding more slicing pain to the foot outside the tub before she could draw it over the side and back into the bath where the blood tricked in swirls into the water. She inspected her foot and saw the cuts, some still with splinters of glass protruding from them. She picked out the splinters, dropping them over the edge of the bath away from her intended exit.

Kneeling, Estela looked over the tub at the floor where she had put her foot. Broken glass. She looked all round the bath for a clear space but there was broken glass everywhere, all round the bath, in a ring two yards or so wide. There was no way she could jump over it, assuming that she could bear to stand on the glass beside the bath and then jump. The very thought made her wince. The bath stool? No. Whoever had strewn the glass had also moved the stool to mock her at the back of the room, beside where her clothes should have been. She took in this new piece of information. Clothes gone. Towels, towels... she scanned the room, knowing already what she would find. No towels. But there was no point worrying about that until she had actually got out of the bath in the first place.

She yelled for help and heard the echoes disappear into the steamy acoustics, the thick walls and no doubt into the clatter and chatter of a grand kitchen before evening meal. Maybe after the meal, or maybe not till the morning, if then, someone might hear her. She shivered as much at the thought of a night in cold water as because she was already cold. There was no way to get rid of the water unless she could make a hole in the tub and use a chunk of the bath itself as a board to walk across the glass? Puncture the solid wood tub with what, exactly? Estela had a bar of soap and her own body. There was no way of scratching or kicking her way through the tub. Think again.
She hated the only plan she could come up with but she had to get out of the tub and there was no other way. Once more she knelt in the bath, leaning over the side so that she could drop her waist-length hair over into a pool on the floor. Contorting herself to reach the hair with her first foot, she climbed out of the bath, bent double all the time, to place her feet on her hair. Then, little by little, she shuffled hair and feet forward, one at a time, in a monkey-crouch that strained her knees to shaking point. An occasional splinter would pierce through the hair into a foot but it was bearable and she kept going until she was sure that she was past the broken glass, when she straightened up with a groan of relief and complaints from her aching muscles, Her swinging hair caught her side and again she felt stabbing pains. Stupid! Her hair was a torture-machine, spiked with splinters of glass. She gathered her hair in one hand, near enough her head to be above the glass splinters and she held it in a pony-tail as far out from her body as she could. Now there was nothing for it but to go out the door, stark naked, holding her hair where it could give her no covering at all. She could only hope that the first person she met would take pity on her. She swallowed hard at the thought of walking through the door into the busy kitchen and her hand was on the latch, ready to face the music when she heard a voice she knew well, on the other side.
‘Estela, are you in there? It’s me, Dragonetz. Aliénor wants you to play tonight and you’re going to be late.’
Help from Dragonetz or face a kitchen-full of curious eyes? Some choices are quickly made. Estela lifted the latch, opened the door enough to hiss round it, ‘Come in here!’ She stepped back quickly so no-one could see her through the doorway as Dragonetz entered the bathroom. ‘Shut the door!’ If she hadn’t been cold, anxious and humiliated, she would have enjoyed the momentary shock in his expression but he mastered himself quickly.
‘It seems you wanted a swim after all,’ he drawled. Then he saw the glass in the hank of hair swinging beside her. ‘What happened?’
‘Turn your back,’ she told him.
‘It’s a bit late for that! You have two breasts and the place of Venus, like all women. I’m not going to ravish you and you’re going to tell me what happened. Let me hold your hair while you put this on.’ While talking, he had removed his tunic and passed it to her.
‘My feet hurt.’ 
He picked her up in his arms and carried her over to one of the tubs with no glass around it. ‘Can you kneel and lean into the tub?’ he asked her quietly and on her assent, he swept up her hair and unloosed it into the clean water in the un-used tub, swishing it back and forwards so that the splinters were dislodged. He took off the belt round his undershirt and used the buckle like a coarse comb, grooming the hair for more splinters. And finally he ran his hand over the hair, combing it with his fingers, checking that it was clear and clean.

Want to read more?
‘Song at Dawn’ is available in all ebook formats from www.smashwords.com FREE  if you use the coupon code FF49C when you check out. UNTIL 24th December – spread the word!
Also available in print from lulu http://www.lulu.com/shop/jean-gill/song-at-dawn/paperback/product-17800067.html